> CD #8: Things I did not buy this week
And yet I am still thinking about them
So it’s been many months since I decided to go on a shopping fast and, by the looks of it, there are still many months to go until the pandemic officially ends, but that hasn’t stopped me from tapping on Instagram ads and pretending I might buy something. It could be the capitalism talking, but I find distinct pleasure in browsing online, finding something I’d like to wear, swiping through different photos of it, checking the size guide, reading customer reviews, and imagining how much better and more interesting my life would be if only I had this one item.
So far, I’ve managed to resist, despite two of my favourite writers recently admitting that pandemic shopping can feel really good at times. Roxane Gay has been buying mini-projectors and watchmaking kits while also acknowledging the futility of her purchases:
It’s amazing how much useless stuff there is in this world and how easily we can convince ourselves that we need it. Actually, it’s disheartening. It’s a problem. There is too much stuff in the world and so much of it is overpriced and unnecessary and contributing to the planet’s demise. On better days, I try to divest myself of being acquisitive, but not every day is a better day.
I feel you, Roxane Gay. Can we please be friends?
And then there’s the novelist Celeste Ng—to whom I have great affinity because my maiden name is Ng and as a little girl, I would’ve loved to share a last name with a New York Times–bestselling author (or a Major League Baseball manager)—whose recent clothing purchase fills me with a surprising amount of envy:
I mean, I don’t actually want paper bag–waisted velvet pants (because I have a short torso and paper bag waists makes me look like I’ve been swallowed by pants), but I do very much want to buy something weird and wonderful or somewhat outlandish.
And so, to alleviate some of these feelings of jealousy—why do they get to be incredibly talented writers and have new things!?—I’m turning to art as a way to feed my need for novelty without actually having to purchase anything.
Here are three ridiculous things I did not buy this week:
1) Coach Apple Print Long Dress with Snap Pockets
I’m not even sure what I like about this dress. I don’t think it would fit me right (see: short torso), and the snap pockets create an unflattering saddlebag effect. Plus, that little ruffle down the middle is sort of cloying. Still, I’ve clicked on the ad at least five times now. I guess I like apples? Years ago, a coworker once told me, “Sometimes a dress has to be a little ugly in order to look good.” I can see his point.
2) Star Wars Mandalorian Superstar The Child Shoes
These would not be an entirely impractical purchase since my current sneakers are falling apart; however, I don’t care at all about Star Wars and have no intention of watching The Mandalorian. I just like the minty colour, which reminds me of a pair of velcro-strap sneakers I had in 1986, when everything seemed easier. “The Child” indeed.
3) Peanuts x Marc Jacobs Mini Box Bag
Cartoonists love the lines and the sensibility of Charles M. Schulz, and basically we all want to be him. I had two Peanuts books as a kid and read them until the pages were falling out. When I close my eyes and really concentrate, I can still smell the yellowing paper and see Charlie Brown on the pitcher’s mound or Rerun on the back of his mother’s bike. I believe fashion collabs have gotten way out of hand, but the fact that this purse has Linus on it and is shaped like a lunchbox? Ok, I admit it. This one hurts a bit.
Maybe if I were a more accomplished writer, I’d have come up with a point to all this by now, but here we are at the end of the newsletter and the only thing that has occurred is a momentary distraction, both for you and for me. But sometimes that’s all we can ask for: a chance to pause and think and look at something interesting—to imagine our way out of our sad little situations just for a while and then come back with fresh eyes and a new hope (see what I did there, Star Wars fans?) for better days to come.
:) Teresa
What is happening even?? Closet Dispatch is a free, limited-run weekly newsletter by Teresa Wong.
Today I clicked through when a glitter Swatch watch caught my eye on Instagram. I had it in the cart before I talked myself down. I already own 3 Swatches and a couple of other watches I have acquired over the years. Please do note that I don’t actually wear a watch and have not since I got my first mobile phone in 2001.